Reset/Refocus

If you have been following me, one of the things you know is that we have been working on self regulation and teaching students to identify their feelings, and practice strategies that help support ‘being on green’ emotionally. But sometimes, kids end up in red….and can’t get back to blue or yellow, much less green. What does all this mean? See below for information.

When a student is in red, they can’t focus on learning, and chances are they are disrupting their classmates from learning as well. When a student is in red, their brain isn’t problem solving rationally, they have gone into fight or flight mode, and chances are their blood pressure and pulse rate has gone up, and their tolerance for stress and anxiety have gone down. Sometimes the adult that is trying to get them to comply is actually adding to the trigger because they don’t understand what the trigger was, or they are treating the episode as if it is a behavioral choice. Spoiler: students don’t generally choose to be in red. This is where reset/refocus comes in. Students need to have the opportunity to stop, calm down, reflect and reset so they can get back to the business at hand…learning. This is easier said than done, and I am always looking for strategies to help kids. The goal behind reset/refocus is for students to learn self calming strategies, social skills for handling stress and teaching replacement behaviors, and accepting responsibility for their actions.

I came across a strategy on facebook this morning, shared by a former librarian, called the ‘Let’s try’ box. This is a craft box with little compartments that each contain a fidget, puzzle or activity that helps kids get their mind off their issue, and help them to reset their body and physical and emotional regulation. I will be the first to say that distraction is one of the best strategies for de-escalation when a student is out of control, and this box, with its novelty, would be a great distraction.

However….I would be cautious in using this box for this purpose. Here is the thing: the goal behind reset/refocus is to teach students to recognize their feelings and how their body feels when they feel these feelings, teach students strategies to self regulate, and to be able to eventually do this without adult support. I’m not sure this box achieves that goal. Here is why: positive reinforcement of a negative behavior. Reset/refocus is a neutral experience because we eventually want that locus of control to return to the student. We do not want the locus of control to be fear of a consequence (I will behave as expected because I am afraid), we do not want to locus of control to be a bribe (I will behave if I get a reward). What we are looking for is students to be able to practice strategies that help them calm their bodies and brains, get out of the fight or flight response and be able to return to learning because it is the healthy thing to do.

So, let me backup and just talk about what causes a student to need to reset/refocus in the first place? The biggest reason that I see with my kiddos is stress. We have kids that have trauma in their back ground, and are easily stressed over small conflicts that many students are resilient enough to overcome . We have students who are behind academically and the content is stressful, especially when they are struggling with mastery. We have students with disabilities that make self regulation difficult on a good day, much less a regular day. The reset/refocus is an opportunity to temporarily be removed from a stressful trigger, get your head together and a game plan for meeting the stresses head on and overcoming them with coaching and support.

The ‘Try it Box’, while assisting in de-stressing by distracting, also runs the risk of becoming a positive reinforcer for a negative emotional state of being. The student who is stressed because a knowledge or ability gap exists in the classroom with the current content being taught…. now the ‘Try it Box’ becomes the preferred activity…and the avenue to get there=misbehavior disguised as lack of self regulation. I have seen this happen with my basket of fidgets, so now I am more cautious with how I use my basket.

Tried and True tips for effective reset/refocus

When followed consistently this strategy for reset/refocus works 90% of the time with 90% of the kids. It takes time and the procedure has to be explicitly taught and reinforced, but it does work. I have used this effectively with students with ODD, ASD, and EI diagnosis as well as students suffering from learned behaviors (meaning, they have learned that tantruming/noncompliance result in positive outcomes). When the adults are consistent, the students get the process and procedure figured out. It isn’t an overnight solution and requires time on the part of the adults managing the behavior. But the way I see it is you can take the time to repeat this three times a day if necessary now, so that you only have to do it once in a while later. I have a designated area in the office where students sit for reset/refocus, and I have different places for different kids depending on their levels and needs.

1. I always start with a timer and the rules for reset refocus, and I always use a neutral tone of voice. NEVER let a student hear frustration or anger in your response to their behavior. Keep a neutral tone of voice, neutral language, and neutral body language. Always make sure the student knows they are NOT in trouble. The rules are this: “When you are ready to sit quietly for five minutes you can push the button (flip the hourglass…) to start your time. When the time is up, I have my basket of fidgets, and you get to pick one to play with for three minutes while we talk”. I stop the timer if they are whining or disruptive with a neutral “ok, when you are ready to sit quietly, we can start the timer again”. A note on the fidgets, I use these as I am teaching the procedure, but once the students know the procedure, we look for other ways to reinforce because we don’t want the students to look at the fidget basket as a preferred activity, and the avenue to that preferred activity is office referral. If students are struggling with getting calm or maintaining composure we do belly breathing together: https://www.pbs.org/parents/crafts-and-experiments/practice-mindfulness-with-belly-breathing. Sometimes I have students count backwards, or do a tongue twister to distract them, and get them back to neutral to restart the timer.
2. Once the five minutes is up, I always thank them for doing a nice job with their body reset…even if it took them 30 minutes to sit quietly for five. Next time it will be less time. We go into the office, and the student picks the fidget (if we are in the training phase of reset/refocus procedure) and we start the debriefing conversation which again is neutral and has two objectives; first have the student accept responsibility for the concern that brought them to the office, and second to discuss strategies they could use in place of the action that they took. There is no consequence assigned as long as they ‘make it right’ which is not only a restorative practice but accountability towards others who may have been impacted by their actions. The caveat to this is if another student was in danger as a result of their actions we have to have some follow up.
3. Document the reset/refocus. I always give the students three opportunities to reset/refocus. However, on the third reset/refocus I make a phone call home and explain that this is the third visit to the office, and on the fourth visit, they can expect a phone call to come pick the student up. After three visits, if we are not able to ‘get it together’ it is unlikely to happen on visits, 4, 5, or 6 either. The parent has the option to pick up at this point for an ‘at home reset/refocus’ which again is non punitive, but on the fourth visit, it is not optional and it is logged as sent home.

Here is why this works: this is a procedure that is followed consistently for every student every time. It is a predictable neutral response. There is no positive or negative reinforcer so the student has nothing to gain but social skills for the experience. By giving students five minutes to practice calming strategies, using the debrief as a teachable moment to teach replacement behaviors, and giving the opportunity for students to ‘make it right’ (accept responsibility) and save face we help them to be more able to handle stress in the future and reduce the need for reset/refocus.